He was playing the tape for the umpteenth time, trying to understand Bill’s reaction when the door opened and Scully walked in. He stabbed the stop button immediately, but too late.
"Mulder? Was that Bill’s voice?"
"Scully, I thought you’d be with the lawyers all day today."
"I was supposed to be, but Bill got called away, so we had to postpone it. Was that Bill?" One look at his face was enough to let her know he didn’t want to get into this.
She approached him then, using his technique of invading body space. She literally stepped between his legs and placed one hand on the back of the chair, leaning over him. "What’s going on Mulder?"
"Scully, please." It hadn’t occurred to him that there would ever be a time he didn’t want to have her this close. "Let me do some checking, then I’ll. . . "
She took the remote from his hand and turned toward the screen. She pressed play and heard Waltos voice asking why Bill had been in town under an assumed name. Bill’s reaction held her motionless.
"Scully?" He rose and sat her in his chair. She didn’t protest even when he took the remote from her hand and again pressed stop.
"What’s going on Mulder?"
"I don’t know. Let me check into it. You don’t need to get
involved."
"Involved? Mulder, do you think Bill had anything to do with. . .?" She had to
swallow hard, hanging onto her composure by her fingernails.
"Bill would never hurt your mother, Scully. I know that, you know it too. I don’t know what he might have been caught up in. It might have nothing to do with your mother."
"The tape." She gestured toward the TV.
"Okay, it doesn’t look real good right now. Waltos obviously caught him off guard, but we don’t know from what. Hell, he could be having an affair and doesn’t want Tara to know. It could be anything Scully. Don’t jump to conclusions."
"Like you haven’t?" She sounded distant, too distant for him.
"I haven’t reached any conclusions Scully. Waltos wants to get to the bottom of this just like we do, he has to check everything out."
"I need to talk to Bill." She started to rise from his chair.
"No." She looked up at him then. He hadn’t shouted, but the tone of his voice meant the same thing. "Scully, you are not going to talk to Bill about this. Not yet and not alone. Please Scully. Let me handle this. Promise me Scully."
"Mulder. . . "
"Promise me." He wasn’t quite touching her, though he could have easily. He was afraid, what if she thought he would force her to do this, physically. He didn’t dare go any farther, but he could feel the distance between them like a chasm. It took everything in him not to pull her into his arms.
"I won’t talk to him today Mulder. You can have that much time. Tomorrow I’m going to him. I have to know Mulder, I have to know.
After a moment he nodded. He started to speak again when the phone rang. He looked at her, then with an exasperated sigh he grabbed the receiver. "Mulder."
"We have some information. You need to come over." Frohike didn’t bother to identify himself.
"It’s not a good time."
"Make it a good time Mulder. This is about what you had us working on. You’ll want to see this."
"I’ll be there as soon as I can." He hung up and turned back to Scully.
"It sounds like you need to be somewhere." She didn’t look at him.
"I don’t want to leave you."
"It’s okay. I’m fine." He winced at that. She couldn’t know how much he hated hearing those words from her lips. "I won’t see Bill today, I said I wouldn’t."
"Scully. . . "
"Go do what you need to do. I’ll talk to you later." She turned and left the office.
Talk to you later? Not see you? Shit, had Bill won after all? He grabbed his jacket and headed over to the Gunman’s apartment.
*****
"What are you dressed for?" Mulder gave Frohike the once over when he finally opened the door.
"I’m supposed to be a tourist. You know, a reason for the video camera."
"Come on guys, I’ve got someplace I need to be. What did you find?" He was getting a headache and wasn’t able to get that defeated look on Scully’s face out of his mind.
Byers took over. "Mulder, we knew Bill was going in to be questioned. We were waiting to follow him when he left."
"You what?" That was dangerous and these guys weren’t trained. The fact that they had done this without being asked, just for Scully and him caused a spasm of guilt in his chest.
"We thought you’d want to know where he went, what he did."
"So you guys followed him. Well. I don’t know what to say, except you should be more careful."
"He never saw us, he was way too distracted."
"Okay, what happened?" They had his full attention now.
"Well," Langly joined the conversation, "he found the first public phone he could and made a call."
"Could you get close enough to hear?"
"No, but we did get close enough with the zoom lens. We got the phone number he called."
"You what?" He was on his feet. "Whose is it?"
"That’s a little strange Mulder. There’s absolutely no record of this number anywhere. Officially it doesn’t exist. We haven’t called it yet. We thought you should be here for that."
"How safe is it to call from your phone?"
"Safe as we can make it."
"Good I want to record the conversation."
"We’re all set up. Do you want to talk, or do you want one of us to handle it?" Byers turned to him, ready to proceed however he wanted.
"One of you might be better. Who wants the honor?" The guys exchanged glances and turned back to Mulder. He grinned, these guys were a trip. He turned to Frohike, and nodded. "Ask for Jim."
Frohike nodded and after throwing a couple of switches, dialed the number. "Yes?"
"I need to talk to Jim." Frohike sounded impatient and angry. Langly grinned.
"There’s no Jim here."
"Damn it Mildred, can’t you even get a frigging message right?" Frohike growled at Langly and slammed down the phone.
Langly high-fived him. "You should have gone into acting bro. Beautiful!"
It was good that Mulder had allowed them to place the call. They turned to him then and saw him white faced, eyes closed, resting his head on the back of the chair.
The three of them sobered immediately. "Mulder? Who was it? Are you okay?"
"I don’t know his name. Scully and I call him Cancer Man. Why in hell was Bill calling him? And how do I tell Scully?" He lowered his face into his hands. "Bill was involved in his mother’s death. How does he live with that? How does Scully?"
*****
It was late when he arrived at her apartment. He still didn’t have a clue how to break this news to her. He didn’t even know if he was welcome inside. When he reached her door he started to knock, then stopped himself. He’d been living here for nearly a week. What would it say if he were suddenly afraid to enter without her permission. He let himself in with his key.
"Scully? Are you here?" He hung his coat up and turned. There was no answer and that disturbed him. The lights were on. She should be here. He stuck his head in the kitchen and bedroom, then headed on to the bath. The door wasn’t locked, so he went on in to find her soaking in the tub, eyes closed. The scent of her bathing oil and the steam in the room filled his head. How could he hurt her like this?
She opened her eyes as the cool air from outside hit her. "Mulder." He shut the door and came on in, sitting on the side of the tub. "I wasn’t sure you were coming."
"Sorry. There was stuff I needed to do. That looks comfortable." He’d imagined sitting here like this in so many cities. Would he ever get the chance again, after what he had to tell her?
"I don’t think you’d fit, Mulder." She sighed, "Are you going to tell me what you were doing?"
"After a while, this is too good to disturb." She smiled, but couldn’t hold it long. "You want some privacy?"
"No. I’m about ready to get out. The water’s cooling anyway." He dipped his hand in the water to test it. Barely tepid, she’d been in here a long time. She held her hands out to him and he lifted her to her feet and when she stepped from the tub wrapped her in the big fluffy towel she had sitting on the wicker stand beside the sink.
"You smell good." He bent over her, and for an instant she felt protected. Too bad it couldn’t last.
She dried off and donned her robe. "Hungry?"
"Not really. But if you want something, we could go out."
"No Mulder. I don’t want to go anywhere." He trailed her out and found he had nothing to say. Nothing that he wanted to say anyway. She sensed his reticence and left it for now. He’d tell her when he could, the fact that it was this hard meant it was bad news.
The ensuing dance they did around each other was as poignant as it was painful. She couldn’t settle down, wandering around the apartment fighting between impatience that he wouldn’t tell her what he had learned and fear that he would. He watched her with no idea of how to approach this subject.
He tensed as she returned to the living room from the kitchen once again. "Scully – "
She panicked. "I’m going to bed Mulder. Good night."
What was he supposed to do? He watched her all but run from the room. Did he follow her? Did she want him to leave? Well that was out, no way he could do that.
He gave her a few minutes, then went into the bedroom. She’d left the light on on his side of the bed. When he joined her he started to speak but she rolled away, turning her back to him.
"No." He placed his hand on her shoulder and gently turned her back toward him. "No, Scully. I’ve waited too many years to be in your bed."
"I can’t Mulder."
"I’m not. . . Scully that’s not what I’m talking about. I don’t want this distance between us. As long as we’ve been friends, this is still new, we’re still new. I don’t know what to say to you. I have information that will cause you pain, I know that." When she shuddered he did draw her close to him. "I can’t stand the thought that we’re going to be damaged. Do you. . . do you want me to leave?"
She burrowed into his chest. "What did Bill do?"
"Scully, I don’t think he did anything. I think he got in over his head. Your mother’s death may have been a punishment, a warning."
"From who? What? What could he be involved in that would lead to this?"
He tightened his grip, taking in the scent of her, the feel of her hair against his face. He had drawn her into this conspiracy. He could have, should have, asked for her transfer years ago. He hadn’t and now their lives were so intertwined even if he wanted to it wasn’t possible. Hell, when she breathed he got oxygen.
He sighed, "When Bill left the police station, the first thing he did was find a phone booth. He made one call."
"Who Mulder?" Still he hesitated. Her arms tightened around him. "Tell me. I have to know."
"Cancer Man."
She thought she’d been ready. She thought in his arms that it wouldn’t be as bad. She’d been wrong. He felt her stiffen. "How. . . how would Bill know him?"
"I don’t know. I’m going to find out Scully. I’m not going to let this go. I know where he lives. I’m going to talk to him tomorrow."
"I’ll go with you."
"No Scully. You can’t. You know you can’t."
"Mulder. . . "
"No. Let me handle this. It’s the best way." She started to pull away. "Please, Scully. Don’t push me away."
She stopped and let him hold her. At first the tears came slowly but they gathered momentum. Finally, after years of wanting to, he was allowed to hold her as she lost control, sobbing into his chest. She cried herself to sleep in his arms and he held her, caressing her through her bad dreams. He might not be able to make it better, but he’d damn well be here trying.
*****
He closed the door behind himself and pulled the pack of cigarettes out of his pocket. That was when he heard the sound of a round entering the chamber.
"We need to talk."
He turned slowly. "Agent Mulder. If I’d known I was going to have company I’d have straightened up a little."
"Why did you kill Mrs. Scully?"
"Mrs. Scully’s dead? I’d heard she was missing." That smug overconfident tone made Mulder’s finger itch to do what he’d wanted to do to this SOB for years.
"What did she ever do? What did Bill do to make this happen?" He might have looked relaxed in the chair, but he was wound tight, ready to spring at this man that symbolized all evil in his life.
"I’m serious Mulder. I didn’t hear she was dead."
Mulder heard the tone then, "Is she dead? Don’t lie to me, because I really want to pull this trigger."
"The last time I saw her, she was very much alive."
"And when was that?"
"Not that long ago." Cancer Man was relaxing a little; Mulder’s gun was no longer pointed directly at his heart. He still didn’t want to make any moves, like sitting on the sofa across from Mulder, but it didn’t look like his blood would be spattered all over the door any longer.
"There was too much blood found."
"I remember them saying the same thing about me. Did you know Mrs. Scully was a regular blood donor? Very civic minded woman."
For the first time Mulder’s hand trembled. "If she’s alive where is she?"
"Safe enough. I’m very good with mothers Mulder. You didn’t complain when I had your mother healed."
"Wha. . .what are you saying?" He’d gone very still at those words. This man had something to do with his mother’s recovery? Don’t let him do this to you Mulder. He’s playing with your mind, stay on top, don’t let him have the satisfaction.
"That you’re not showing the proper gratitude. Though I have to say, I healed her as much for me as I did for you. Your mother is an extraordinary woman. So is Mrs. Scully in her own way. Different, but extraordinary nevertheless."
Change the subject back! Don’t dwell on this, you can think about it later. Get back to the subject at hand! "You’re telling me Maggie Scully is alive. Are you holding her prisoner?"
"She’s in my custody now, though that’s not how it started. Your Agent Scully has reason to be grateful to me as well."
"Where is she?"
"All in good time, Agent Mulder. She’s safer with me right now than she would be in the loving arms of her daughter. Or her semi-loving son. Bill isn’t as bright as his sister, or he lets his emotions get in the way too much. He really hates you Mulder. What is it you did to him to make him feel so strongly about you?"
"What is it you want from us?" Whatever it was, he’d get it. In order to give Scully back her mother, hell, if he wanted the X-Files, they were his. Mulder leaned back in the leather chair that was obviously Cancer Man’s favorite. The smell of him was a permanent part of the furniture.
"Some people didn’t understand your importance to the project, Agent Mulder. Using Bill Scully to try to destroy you was a pitiful attempt. He’s not man enough to handle the assignment and the people directing him are too shortsighted to be of any further use to us. Give me a couple of days, Fox. I think I can make this go away."
"How? How could you. . . what do you mean my importance to the project? I’ve been opposing you my whole life."
"I’m sure that’s how it looks to you. Go home Agent Mulder, or to Agent Scully’s apartment, and let me handle this."
He decided to ignore the reference to where he slept now. "You want me to trust you with Mrs. Scully’s life?"
"Did it sound like I was offering a choice?" Now he finished retrieving the cigarette he’d reached for earlier. "Give me 48 hours to clear up some loose ends. I give you my personal assurance that Mrs. Scully will remain where I can keep an eye on her. Killing me now would complicate things significantly."
Mulder released the tension on the trigger. "I want Mrs. Scully back."
"And I want the status quo for now. You will give me time to clean this up. Can I offer you a beer?"
Mulder snorted. "Why do you need 48 hours to return her?"
"I don’t want this action, or one like it, repeated. I need to make some people understand my position and how seriously I take it."
Mulder stood. "48 hours. If she’s not home, I will find you. I won’t hesitate to kill you then." Cancer Man nodded but wisely did not extend his hand.
*****