Frohike
was frankly stunned to see her when he got the door opened.
She couldn’t remember the last time she had seen him speechless. He stepped back immediately to welcome her in and
they followed him into the apartment.
“Mulder,
you were right to check those other databases, we - “ Byers stopped when he realized
that she was with him.
“Thank
you. I want you to know how much this means
to me.”
Byers
rose to his feet and the other two moved closer to him.
“We’d do anything . . . If we - “ he stumbled to halt in his
speech.
“Don’t.” Her eyes were already moist; this compassion was
more than she could take right now. She
cleared her throat and straightened her shoulders. “What
have you found out?”
“Uh,
yeah. Here, it’s not legal standard, but
we have a couple of hits and thought you’d like to check into it.”
“Military?” This from Mulder.
His body tensed when Langly nodded. “Let
me see what you have.”
They
all glanced over at her, as though for permission. Mulder
lowered himself into the extra chair for the best view.
She nodded and Byers brought a military ID photo up on the screen. Mulder’s eyes narrowed as he looked at the
bland face of her possible assailant.
He
turned then to look at her and was on his feet immediately.
She had gone deathly pale and her eyes looked impossibly huge. He had her in her arms and she sagged
against him. He supported her to the couch
and sat her there, then knelt in front of her. “I’m
going to take that as a positive ID, Scully.”
She
barely nodded. Frohike approached them then
and offered her a glass with an amber liquid in it. “It’s
brandy.”
“Take
it Scully.” He took the glass from
Frohike’s hand and pressed it into hers. “Go
on.”
After
a moment she lifted the drink to her lips and took a sip.
That brought a little color back to her face.
“I want you to stay in here with Frohike. I need to talk to Byers for a minute, then
I’m going to take you home.” He
wasn’t sure she heard him, but he looked over at Frohike who nodded.
He
reluctantly returned to the other room. “I
need to get her out of here. Can you get me a
printout and everything you have on this guy?”
“It’s
printing now. Is she . . .?”
“No. I want to get her home.” Langly pulled the paper from the printer and
handed it to him. “Can you keep looking,
for the other two?”
“We’re
on it. You look after her. If you need help with . . . we’re
available.”
He
shook his head; the next step was his and his alone.
He stuffed the paper into his jacket pocket.
“I’m getting her out of here.
Let me know what else you find, but I don’t think she’s up to
another trip over here anytime soon.”
“You
can count on us Mulder.”
He
nodded and returned to her. “Let’s
get out of here, okay?” She looked up at
him. All of the progress she had made seemed
gone. Her expression was stricken; it had all
been thrown back into her face when she’d seen that man’s file.
He
helped her to her feet and moved her toward the door.
He glanced back at Frohike once, who was watching Scully. Their eyes met and Frohike’s look of sympathy
nearly undid him. He needed to get himself
out here as well as her. He opened the door
and led her out without a word.
She
was silent on the way back to his place. He
didn’t attempt conversation, she wasn’t able and he wasn’t sure he was. He wanted to get her settled so that he could
study the information they had gotten.
Once
in his apartment he tried to lead her into the bedroom.
“Mulder, I want, I need a shower.
Please.” She wouldn’t
face him.
“Sure,
anything you need. You know that.” She turned from him then without a comment. He felt a growing sense of despair as he watched
her disappear into the bathroom. She
didn’t quite close the door, as though more afraid than ever of being alone.
He
heard the water come on and slipped the paper from his pocket. He stared at the face of this man that had
violated her and felt a murderous rage build in him.
This man was going to die, die horribly at his hands. That was a pledge.
He
forced his eyes away from the face and began memorizing the rest of the information on
this man. He finally realized that the water
was still running. The hot water should be
long gone by now. Was she okay?
He
moved to the door, “Scully? Scully, are
you okay?” He pushed the door open. The room was full of steam, but he could see her
silhouette, scrubbing furiously at her skin. “Scully! Scully stop it.” He reached in and turned off the water, then
yanked a towel from the rack and wrapped it around her.
She collapsed against him and he lifted her into his arms and carried her
into the bedroom. She was sobbing
uncontrollably by the time he got her to the bed.
He
found her robe and wrapped it around her, then wrapped himself around her as well. “Scully, Scully breathe. I’m here, I’m not going to let anything
happen to you.”
He
wasn’t sure she could hear the words, but she clung to him as though for her life. He had never seen her like this. That strengthened his resolve, he couldn’t
make this right, but the men that had harmed her would pay and pay painfully.
He
had no idea how much time passed before she regained any composure and her exhaustion was
total. “Sleep, Scully. I’ll be right here.” Her eyes slid closed without an acknowledgment.
He
didn’t leave her that night, holding her through dreams and crying spells that
didn’t wake her fully. In the morning he
woke to find her watching him. He returned
her gaze, bringing a finger up to caress her cheek. "How
do you feel?”
She
shook her head, but he didn’t retreat. Finally
she looked away, “Empty, embarrassed . . . dirty.”
He
hadn’t expected that much honesty. “You’re
not embarrassed in front of me?”
She
managed a weak smile at that. “Who
else?”
“After
all the situations you’ve seen me in? The
things you’ve pulled me out of? We’re
nowhere near even, Scully.”
“I
don’t know how to, how to get beyond this Mulder.
I thought I was doing okay, I really did.
But when I saw . . . Am I ever going to be able to - “
“Scully. It’s only been a few days; you need to
remember that. Maybe you ought to see someone
though, someone that’s trained to help you.”
She shuddered at the thought. “Scully?”
“I
can’t talk about this Mulder, not even to you. How can I talk to some stranger?
“I’ll
help you any way I can.” His hand
caressed her shoulder.
“I
know.” It was a whisper. “But I can’t, not yet. Please Mulder, let me . . . “
He
nodded, “For a little while, Scully. For
a little while.”
She
brought his head down to her and kissed his forehead, then slid out of the bed, pulling
her robe around her. It finally came to her
that they had slept like this all night and he’d taken no advantage. No, Mulder would never . . . she breathed a little
easier.
When
he emerged from the bathroom she was dressed for work.
“Scully, I don’t think you should try to go in. I can make up some excuse or cover for you. Skinner doesn’t even have to know.”
“I
need this. I need something that feels
familiar, something I know I’m good at. And
you’ll be there.” That statement
rendered his argument moot and finally he nodded.
*****
“Mulder,
we can’t get anything on the third man. You
have everything we can get. You knew it was
iffy from the beginning.”
He
dropped a disk on the desk and leaned on his hands.
“Damn it! There’s
nothing else you can get from the rape kit?”
Byers
looked up startled. “Mulder, we never
got anything from the rape kit. I thought you
knew. Everything we’ve gotten came from
the pajamas you found. Apparently they had
‘safe’ sex with her.”
Mulder
felt his knees start to give way with that. All
three of the men converged on him as he tightened his hold on the desk to remain upright,
finally collapsing into the chair Langly shoved at him.
It had been that calculated. The
men had been hired for this and hadn’t wanted to endanger themselves! He
hadn’t realized he could hate anyone this much.
He
motioned them away and pulled himself up. She
was just in the next room and he didn’t want her to see him like this. He had to be strong for her. She had no idea how this had affected him and she
never would.
He
had two names; one of them would supply the
third. He would make sure of that. He wouldn’t have to bring her into it. He couldn’t, the first identification had
been too much for her. He wouldn’t put
her through that again. She was still
refusing to talk to anyone, but she was working, and working well. She actually seemed to forget for a little while
when they were on the road. The Bureau
didn’t have to know that one of the rooms they took remained empty at night. If she felt safer with him, that was their
business, no one else’s.
But
he needed to be alone for what he was planning. She
couldn’t accompany him for this. The
problem was he couldn’t leave her alone. He
wouldn't leave her alone. She was still living with him; there was no way
she could be unaware if he was gone. Ditching
her would be a bad idea, for both of them.
Could
he convince her to stay here, for a couple of days, maybe less? He had to; he had to get to these men.
“I’m
taking her home for now. Are you okay with
her staying here?”
“You
know we are, but you shouldn’t go alone Mulder.”
“Got
to.” There was no discussion to be had
on that point. He was planning murder here,
cold-blooded murder; no one else was going to be involved.
There would be no courtrooms, no juries, and definitely no reprieves. Not even for him.
*****
He
looked around the bar, taking the site in, memorizing the layout. The uniform was unfamiliar, but it fit like a
glove. He’d gotten past asking the guys
were they got this stuff.
He
froze as he saw the man enter the bar. This
was the first man the gunmen had found, the one that had sent Scully into the tailspin. He
was a private, a medium size man, not too bright looking.
Well, it was obvious he wasn’t too smart - he’d hurt Scully.
Mulder
continued to nurse his beer. He
wasn’t going to approach this man - not in public anyway. When he saw him pay for his drinks and move
toward the door, Mulder was moving too.
Mulder
jogged in the dark out away from the bar and waited as the man pulled his car away. Mulder stepped out and waved the man down. “Private, you headed back to base? Could you give me a lift?”
“Yes
sir, no problem.” Mulder let himself in
on the passenger side.
“I
really appreciate this Private. My car died
and I was headed to the bar to use a phone.”
“Glad
I came along when I did, Sir.” They were
out of sight of the bar now and there was no traffic.
Mulder eased the gun from his waistband.
“I
want you to make a right onto that dirt road just ahead.”
“Do
what?” The private looked over at Mulder
and his eyes widened. “What the
hell?”
“You
heard me. That’s right.” Mulder’s voice was low, menacing.
“I
don’t have any money.”
“Shut
up and drive.” They drove in a
tense silence for several miles on the dirt road until Mulder spotted the barn he had
investigated earlier. “Here. Pull in.”
“What
do you think you’re going to do with me?” The
man’s shock was wearing off and his anger was growing despite the gun.
“Shut
up and put your hands behind you.” The
man put the car in park, but didn’t comply with Mulder’s request, until he heard
a bullet being ratcheted into the chamber.
He
slowly removed his hands from the wheel and turned his back slightly toward Mulder. He was cuffed quickly. “Who the hell are you? What’s going on here?”
Mulder
didn’t respond as he shut the car off and pocketed the keys. He then exited the car and moved to the
driver’s side, and opened the door. “Get
out.”
The
bound man glared at him but kept quiet for now, exiting the car awkwardly. Mulder shoved him toward the barn and
muttering the man moved in that direction. Once
inside, Mulder switched on the lantern he had stored there and had the man sit at one of
the beams that supported what was left of the roof.
“Face
it. Put your legs around it.”
“Tell
me what’s going on.”
“Your
legs, now.” Once the man had moved into
position, Mulder snapped cuffs around his ankles as well, imprisoning him to the beam. “Your name Vince Dean?”
“I’m
not answering any questions until I know what’s going on.” He was still bluffing, not believing his peril.
“Did
you attack a woman in Georgetown, you and two other men, about three weeks ago?” He watched the man’s face pale, but he
didn’t answer. “I don’t
believe I heard you soldier.” He had his
face down close to his now and for the first time the man knew true fear.
“Who
are you?” But his voice wavered
slightly.
“I
have a question and your answer will determine how easily you die.” Vince’s eyes grew even larger. “I know one of the other men was Stu Bremman,
I want the name of the third man.”
“You're
crazy. I don't know what you're talking
about.” But Mulder could see the sweat
beginning to bead on his forehead.
“I
have all the proof I need.”
“Then
call the police, man, and when I tell them about this - “
“You’re
not going to any court.” His voice was
icy, hard. “I want the name of the third
man.”
“No
way.”
“We’ll
see about that.” Mulder moved around him
and unfastened his hands, then brought them around the beam and recuffed him, so that he
was seated on the ground, his limbs around the solid support beam.
“Hey! You’re not leaving me here?”
“What’s
the name of the third man?”
“I
can’t! Mister, listen to me, I
can’t!” He was pleading now, but
even he realized it was useless. He watched
as Mulder removed a roll of duct tape from its hiding place and move toward him once more. “No, listen man, don’t do this.”
“Did
you give her a chance?” Vince’s Adam’s apple bobbed as he
swallowed but he had no answer to that. Mulder
wound the tape around his mouth and head twice before stopping. “Sleep well.” Mulder then moved over to the electric lantern
and picked it up, moving toward the door.
He
didn’t look back as he exited the barn. He
drove the man’s car back toward the base and abandoned it at a pawnshop near the
gates. One down.
Mulder
wanted to call her, check on her. Hell, he
needed to hear her voice, but he didn’t dare. It
might weaken his resolve to stay away from her until he was through.
She
had been extremely upset when she realized he really was going. No, she'd been pissed as shit. He hadn't admitted why he was going away, but she
knew. And it scared her. Hell, it scared him too. He didn't want to play Dirty Harry, as she had
hurled at him, but these men were not getting away scot-free. Never. He
had to finish this. He let himself into his
room. This motel was worse than most, of
course he’d never allow her to stay in a place like this, she deserved better. His adrenaline was dissipating. He didn’t have everything he needed yet, but
he would.
He
got ready for bed, feeling the need to wash after being in Vince’s presence. Stu looked just as sleazy from the photo. He should have him in custody before this time
tomorrow. Mulder lay on the bed, not even
bothering with the TV, knowing sleep was a long way away, if possible at all, and stared
into the darkness.
*****
Both
men were now secured in the barn Mulder had scouted out.
Neither was very happy, but Stu hadn’t had the pleasure yet of spending
the night. Vince was now convinced of
Mulder’s intention.
“I
want the name of the third man.”
“Well
you ain’t gettin’ it from me. I
rather take my chances with you any day.” Stu
yanked on the cuffs that restricted his hands. Vince
looked over at him but kept quiet.
“You’re
more afraid of him than you are of me?” Even
Stu stopped at the sound of his voice. Vince
shivered slightly.
“Stu
- “
“Shut
up, he’s just trying to scare us.”
“Is
it working?” Mulder moved closer to him
and Stu leaned away from him.
“You’ve
got nothing on us, no proof.”
“DNA. I have you.”
“DNA? No way man. Now
I know you’re lying.”
Mulder
pulled the torn pajamas from the paper bag he carried.
“Wanna bet?”
“There’s
no . . . “ Stu looked over at Vince, “Did he . . . Shit! That lousy son of a bitch, could he have . .
.?”
“What? Was the third man supposed to protect you? And instead he sold you up the river? You’d rather take your chances with him? Why don’t I let you sleep on it
tonight.” Mulder replaced the cloth
tenderly in the bag and stepped back.
Vince
gave a low moan, “Shut up!” Stu
spat at him. “He’s not going to
kill us, he would have already.”
Mulder
turned his back on them and left the barn. Stu
was partly right, he was no long quite as sure he could just kill them. They were people - scum of the earth and deserving
of a horrible death - but living people nevertheless.
Maybe he had better start thinking of a new plan, just in case.
He
could hear them whispering but couldn’t quite make out the words. No problem, he had purposely not gagged them
tonight.
He
got in the car and returned to his motel room.
He slept even less that night, he was just grateful he didn’t
remember the dream that jerked him awake.
He
lay in the dark, envisioning her, wishing she were beside him tonight. He didn’t know what tomorrow would bring. He had killed people before, but never in cold
blood. It wasn’t that he was changing
his mind - they deserved whatever happened to them, but . . . he desperately wanted to see
her.
He’d
become used to living with her, having her around. He
had worried about that in the beginning, with both of them so used to living alone. It hadn’t been a problem; she had melded into
his apartment just as she had melded into his life - as though she had always been there. If his video collection had gotten a little dusty,
he certainly hadn’t cared. Being
celibate with her around was a little more difficult, but he would never presume where she
was concerned. She’d been hurt enough. He sighed and closed his eyes.
*****
He
didn’t bother to speak when he arrived at the barn the next morning. He’d brought food and drink, and placed it
where it was plainly visible. The look in
Vince’s eye was almost comical.
He
moved directly to the post that separated the two men and removed the recorder from the
place that he had secreted it. He saw Vince
go pale and Stu shut his eyes.
“Think
I might have gotten some information boys?” He
pressed rewind and then play.
“You
keep your mouth shut Vince. Clint has
connections, we wouldn’t survive a day in prison or anywhere else if he thought we
had squealed on him.”
“But
he set us up! It had to be him that left the
. . . the evidence behind.”
“It
don’t matter. He - “
Mulder
cut the recorder off. “Clint. Okay, now I want to know who hired you.”
“We
don’t know. Listen mister, we took our
orders from him, from Clint. It was his contract, he just paid us to go along.”
“Shut
up Vince!”
Mulder
moved over to the food and laid the recorder down, then opened the bag and removed a ham
and egg biscuit. He could see Vince salivate
from where he stood.
“How
hungry are you Vince?”
The
man didn’t respond, just watched Mulder’s eyes.
His shoulders sagged as he realized that he was dead either way. “Very.”
Mulder
nodded and approached him, placing the biscuit and juice beside him. He removed the key to the cuffs and unlocked them,
then stepped back and drew his gun. “Eat.”
Vince
didn’t wait for a second invitation, scooping up the sandwich with one hand and the
juice with the other. When he was through he
looked up at Mulder. “Hands.” He nodded and placed his arms back around the
pole.
He
watched Mulder’s eyes as he rose. “You're
going to kill us aren’t you?”
“Talk
to me about Clint.”
“Vince
- “
“You
shut up, Stu! He set us up; he planted evidence against us. To hell with him!” He turned back to Mulder. “You won’t get him, men like him are
above the law and you can’t get close enough to hurt him yourself.” Mulder didn’t respond, waiting.
Vince
shook his head. “I don’t know who
hired him. I swear. He came to us; we’ve done little things for
him before. This was the biggest. He was . . . “
“What?”
“He
was excited about this job. I don’t know
what he meant, but he said something about being in the big time now. He . . . he went first, he enjoyed it too.” Vince was unaware of the tension that had overcome
Mulder’s body as he relived that night. “I’d
never seen him . . . like that, he wanted to hurt her.
She was barely conscious when - “ He looked up at Mulder’s face
then and his own lost all color. Any other
words he’d been about to say were stuck in his throat.
Mulder
turned without a word and headed for the door.
“Hey,
wait! Don’t I get any food?” Stu called to him.
“What’s
Clint’s last name?” He turned to
look at Stu. The bound man looked away. “Where can I find him?”
Vince
looked over at Stu, then back at Mulder. “The
base. I don’t know his last name.” Stu growled at him, but said nothing. Mulder tossed the bag with the remaining food in
their direction and left.
He
was on the phone immediately. “Langly,
find me someone on the base named Clint. And
hurry.” He pulled the car out onto the
paved road and returned to the bar.
Once
there he entered and ordered a sandwich and a beer.
He had to wait somewhere for Langly’s call, but it seemed to be taking
forever. Intellectually he knew that
wasn’t true - things were actually moving quickly, but he wanted this to be over. He wanted to be back with her.
He
ate seated at the bar and wasn’t paying attention to the clientele. Mulder checked his watch again, why hadn’t
Langly called? He missed the man that entered
as he was finishing his meal. The man
didn’t miss him though and his eyes widened in recognition before he slipped into a
back booth to keep on his eye on Mulder.
Frustrated,
Mulder finally rose from the bar and headed out the door.
The man watching him followed discretely.
Once
in the car Mulder pulled out his cell phone again. “Langly,
anything?”
“No
Mulder, we’re still trying. There’s
no ‘Clint’ on the base and our source went wiggy when we asked. He knows something, but he’s too scared to
talk to us.”
“So
Clint exists. My friends are scared of him
too. Keep trying; I’ll head back to
them. Is she . . .?”
“She’s
missing you. I think she knows what’s
going on.”
“She
is Scully, man. I’ll be home
soon.” He replaced the phone in his
pocket and pulled out of the parking lot.
He
was nearly out of sight of the place before the car began following him, and only the dust
showed the man where Mulder had turned onto the dirt road.
On instinct the man followed the dust cloud at a slow pace. He spotted Mulder’s car up ahead, parked at
an abandoned barn. He pulled his own car off
the road and proceeded on foot, his weapon drawn.
If
Mulder was this close it wasn’t good, and he wasn’t about to take any chances. He’d thought leaving the evidence was a lark. That uptight bitch of a partner of his would never
go public with what had happened to her, it had been a joke to keep the other guys in
line. He hadn’t counted on Mulder taking
the initiative.
The
man moved closer to the barn. If he was
right, the two missing morons were inside and since Mulder was looking for
‘Clint’ they had to have talked. No
problem, he had the advantage of surprise, and out here, no one would find them for a very
long time.
He
was just outside the door now and he still couldn’t hear very well, however he could see. Stu
was shackled around a post, when he moved slightly he could see that someone was shackled
around another one. That had to be Vince. Those stupid assholes - how had they gotten
themselves caught like this? And where was
Mulder standing? It would be best to get him
out of the way first, but all three were going to die, no more loose ends on this
assignment.
He
must have moved too much, because he realized Stu had spotted him seconds before he
blurted out his name in fear. “Clint, no!”
That settled that.
The
bullet caught Stu in the throat, severing the artery.
The man was dead before he had time to fall against the post that held him. Clint was inside now, pivoting toward Mulder. Vince had been scared silent.
Damn
the agent was fast; Mulder already had his gun out.
So what? He fired at him as the
FBI agent dived for some debris as a shield. A
tight smile appeared on Clint’s face as he saw blood blossom on Mulder’s coat.
Mulder
wasn’t out, but he was down. That gave
him the time to turn and take care of Vince with no more thought than squashing a bug.
He
turned back to Mulder now. Time to finish off
this icon that the men who had hired him feared so. He
hadn’t been in their employ long, a few small jobs and then this one - hurt the
partner, make him back off. It was a stupid
plan in his opinion, if they wanted to be rid of Mulder, go ahead and be rid of him, but
he’d seen the partner and it wouldn’t hurt his feelings to get a little time in
- it was their plan after all.
She
was a feisty bitch, she'd actually fought for a while, even knowing there were three of
them. His blow to her head had finally calmed
her down, then the fun had begun. He’d
gotten first dibs, but he’d left enough to satisfy the other two. A smile came to his face as he remembered her. That smile is what sealed his fate.
When
Mulder saw it, saw that smile, he had known instantly what the man was thinking. He went ice cold, the pain in his shoulder
vanishing as the frigid fury took over his body. This
man was going to die. Clint was a murderer
now as well as a rapist, doing Mulder's job for him.
It didn't matter what happened to him, this man was already dead, even if he
didn’t know it.
Mulder
silently reached for his second gun. He
wasn’t quite as good left handed, but with both guns in play, that shouldn’t be
a problem.
He
rose as though he had all the time in the world. Clint
was just a fraction late seeing him stand. His
mind had been on other things for a second there. Big
mistake, Mulder’s first shot knocked him back against the post that held Stu. That kept him upright though and he managed to
fire at Mulder. His aim was off, and Mulder
didn’t even bother to duck, bringing his left hand up and firing again.
Mulder’s
next conscious thought was that his guns were empty.
He had no recollection of firing all of those rounds, but the evidence was
in front of him. Both guns had been fully
loaded, now the firing pin was hitting nothing and ‘Clint’ was lying on the
filthy floor of the barn in a large pool of blood.
It
took a minute for Mulder to get his breath, he must have been holding it the whole time
and after staring at the man in front of him for a long moment, he pulled his cell phone
from his pocket. Once the police were on the
way, he moved to replace the phone and winced for the first time as his own bullet wound
made itself known to him. He’d need to
get Scully to look at it; she could patch him up.
*****
He
wandered into the kitchen and spotted her at the counter.
He couldn’t stop the smile from growing on his face. It felt so good having her here, even if she
hadn't quite forgiven him. At least she
hadn't left him and she had patched him up quite well.
His smile faded as she turned to him. “Is
something wrong?”
“No. I just . . . I was . . . I need to think about
going home.”
“You
are home.” That slipped out before he
thought about it.
She
gave him a sad little smile. “Not
really. I need to get back to my apartment. I have - “
“What? I don’t mind getting it for you.”
“Mulder. I have to go back sometime. All of my things, my furniture is there. And you need your space.”
“My
space.” He thought about that for a
couple of seconds. “My apartment has
never looked better, I’m eating like a king, and I wake up with a beautiful woman in
my arms every morning. Yeah, I need things to
go back like before.”
She’d
looked away at the ‘in my arms’ part. Now
she faced him again. “But you deserve
more.”
“More?”
She
moved toward the living room, her hands fumbling with the coffee cup. “Mulder, what if you meet someone and you
want to start a relationship with her. I’m
in the way here.”
“Start
a relationship? Scully, I’m in a relationship.
I have been for years and I’m not looking to meet anyone. Are you?”
He followed her and almost took her hand.
Was she looking for a way out?
“No. Mulder, damn it.” She studied the coffee intensely. “You deserve a whole woman. One who’s not afraid - “
“Scully,
stop it. I haven’t tried to push you
have I? I haven’t meant to put any
pressure on you. If I have - “
“You
haven’t. But a woman who was whole
wouldn’t make you wait this way. You
could be in a healthy relationship, maybe even start a family.” She absolutely would not look up at him now.
“Scully,
when you’re ready you’ll tell me.” He
decided to ignore the family part; that wasn’t a topic they should get into right now
anyway. “Until then I like things the
way they are. Well, except for one
thing.” She looked up and he saw the
fear in her eyes. “It is a little
crowded around here. I was thinking about
looking for another place. Maybe a two
bedroom.”
“So
we could have separate rooms.”
“Did
I say that? Stop putting words in my mouth
Scully. I like sleeping with you; I
don’t miss the nightmares at all. I was
thinking we could use an office. We both have
a lot of stuff and I’d really like to keep the couch.
It just wouldn’t go too well with your furniture.”
She
was staring at him, mouth slightly open. “You
want to live with me?”
He
glanced around the apartment and then back at her. “What
are we doing now Scully?”
She
hesitated, that question had caught her off guard. “You’re
letting a friend stay over following a traumatic experience.”
“Yeah.
Can you see me curled around Frohike each
morning? No, don’t go there.” But he delighted at the smile that took over her
face at that visual.
It
didn’t last long. “Mulder, I’m
serious. I’ve been here a lot longer
than I had ever imagined. You need your life
back. You need to meet a whole - “
“Stop,
stop right there. You are a whole woman.
I’m tired of you referring to yourself that way. You are the most ‘whole’ woman I have
ever met.”
“Don’t
patronize me Mulder. I wasn’t whole
before this happened, and now - “
“Now
what, Scully?” He was watching her too
closely. She looked away, trying to escape
him. “Scully, please.”
“Mulder,
damn it, I’m supposed to be at my sexual peak. I’m
living with the most desirable man I’ve ever known, and I can’t even - “
“Wait! Back . . . back up a minute. You . . . you think I’m desirable?” The glare she shot him didn’t even faze him. He sank onto the couch and looked up at her,
giving her the position of power. “Are
you saying that there’s a chance in hell that you might want to be more than
partners?”
She
sat down on the coffee table, facing him finally. “That’s
what I’m talking about. A real woman
would jump at the chance to be with you.”
He
just stared at her speechless.
“Mulder,
stop it. You haven’t had a woman over
here since I moved in. That’s not fair
to you. I can’t - “
“Just
for the record Scully, I hadn’t had a woman over here for years prior to you moving
in.”
“Mulder,
I - “
“It’s
true Scully.”
She
looked away, “Regardless, you deserve more than I can give you.”
“Scully,
tell me, have I pushed you? I need to
know.”
He
saw her shoulders relax a little then. “No. No, Mulder. You’ve
been wonderful. You’ve kept me sane. I’m not . . . I know you've not given me the
complete story about . . . but I know you’re responsible for their punishment.”
“They
deserved what happened to them.” She
looked down. They'd been over this before. He had been cleared of all charges. It had been proven beyond a doubt that Clint had
killed Stu and Vince. And he had shot Mulder. That meant self-defense. Why Clint had taken the two men out to the
abandoned barn had not been explained, but with Clint dead that would probably never be
explained.
“Scully,
could you care for me?”
She
looked up quickly. “I already do.”
“Then
stay. I’m serious, Scully. I want you to stay.
If you want . . . more,” he cleared his throat, unsure what it was she
wanted, “we can get through this.”
He
watched her shoulders sag. She didn’t
believe him. What could he do to help her
see? He had to help her - as much for himself
as for her. It was true he didn’t want
her to move out. When she’d moved in he
hadn’t given it that much thought; knowing it was temporary. As the time passed and more of her things appeared
in the apartment it had felt right. Now it was right and he didn’t want to even think
about her leaving. Hell he’d even
learned to put the seat down. With his
willingness to take that kind of training, surely she didn’t want to go.
*****
He
joined her in bed and propped himself up on one elbow to look down at her. She had her back to him, and didn’t jump as
his finger began outlining her ear. She
didn’t move at all, but her breathing grew shallow.
Finally
she spoke, “Mulder, what . . . what are you doing?”
“I’m
investigating your ear.”
“Why?”
“I’m
a desirable male.” She relaxed then and
chuckled lightly. “I knew I should never
have said that.”
“Ahh,
but you did.” He kissed her ear, then
rolled over and switched off the light, leaving her staring after him, speechless.
Nothing
was mentioned the next day though she found herself watching him; it was as though it had
never happened.
The next night she was already tense when he came into the room. He lay down beside her, again with her back to
him. She turned to stone as she felt his hand
find its way inside her pajama top. He
lightly kneaded the muscles in her back.
“You
still counting on your desirability as a man?” She
asked, her voice only shook slightly.
He
decided to ignore the question. “You’re
awfully tense.” He continued to massage
her back, not removing her top or straying forward to touch her breasts. He felt her begin to relax and smiled to himself. After a few more minutes he withdrew his hand,
kissed the ear that he had investigated the night before again, then rolled away from her
and switched off the light.
She sat up then and looked down at him. What
the hell? She didn’t have a clue what to
say, so after a moment she eased back down. She
felt more relaxed in one way, but more keyed up in another.
She lay there, confused. She
almost asked questions a couple of times, but finally fell asleep. She didn’t see the smile that kept appearing
on his face.
Scully
was distracted most of the day, but Mulder made no comment, merely finding the things she
kept misplacing in the office. It was his
night to cook, so she was a little surprised to find wine on the table. He almost never drank, but she made no comment. Maybe it would make things clearer for her.
When
she was getting ready for bed that night, she realized her pajamas were missing. Mulder must have put them in the laundry. Rather than dig through the unfolded clothes,
which were in the other room anyway, she pulled out a nightgown and slipped it on. She got in bed and pulled the covers up over her.
She
glanced up when he entered the room and her breath caught to see that he was only wearing
shorts, no t-shirt. He’d worn a t-shirt
every night since she’d come here. She
couldn’t tear her eyes away from him, from the pattern of hair on his chest. She couldn’t seem to get a full breath. He
didn’t even seem to notice, just climbing into the bed and stretching out, taking
part of her side of the bed.
“Mul
. . . Mulder, what’s going on?”
“Um? What?” He glanced at her then away, ignoring
her turmoil.
She
realized her hand was on his chest. When did
that happen? He didn’t seem to mind, and
he had touched her - kind of - the last two nights. No,
she couldn’t do this. She probably
couldn’t follow through and that wasn’t fair to him.
But
she hadn’t removed her hand. “Mulder,
I don’t know . . . “
“Your
show Scully, your pace.”
“You
. . . you’d be okay if I couldn’t . . . “
“I’m
good with whatever you decide. You know that,
don’t you?”
She
nodded, her fingers entangling in his chest hair now.
His breath caught as she brushed his nipple.
He got that under control, there was nothing he could do about his cock, so
he tried to ignore it.
It
wasn’t as easy for her. She glanced down
and he saw her face pale. He brushed a finger
along her cheekbone. “Scully, don’t
worry about that. Please.”
“Ignore
part of your desirability?” She managed
to smile.
The
chuckle rumbled in his chest, it turned to a gasp as Scully rolled his nipple between her
fingers.
“Would
you touch me?” It was barely a whisper.
He
blinked but managed to nod. “Where?”
“My
breasts?” It was barely a breath that
time. His hand found and cupped her breast. She shook her head and he stopped. “Not through the nightgown.” A small smile played around his lips then. He slowly found the hem of her nightgown and at
her slight nod, lifted it gently over her head. That
left only the panties.
She
was beautiful, more than he had imagined - and more fragile than she had ever let him see
before she’d moved in. Those men
couldn’t hurt her again, they’d never hurt anyone again - he’d seen to
that, but it had been too late for her. She
was trying. He just had to make sure he
didn’t scare her, didn’t rush her, even if she was trying.
His
hand cupped her breast again, his thumb brushing her nipple, which immediately hardened
into a little bud. He felt the shiver run
through her whole body. “Your decision
Scully. Your pace.” When she made no move to stop him, he began
caressing her body, exploring all those places he’d fantasized about all of these
years. He had to be slow, gentle - this was
for her, not for him. She did seem to be
enjoying it - it sounded like she was purring.
After
a little while she took hold of his hand and moved it to the elastic of her panties. He looked up at her face. “Scully?”
She
nodded, “Before I change my mind.”
He
took that in. He was going to give her plenty
of time to change her mind. For now he could
continue showing her pleasure without pressure. He
slipped her panties from her body and let them fall near her nightgown.
He
slid his finger into her crevasse. She was
slick with juices. Her body was ready even if
her mind remained ambivalent. He needed to
let her know that sex could be enjoyable, safe with the right person. He wanted to be that right person for her.
He
continued to caress her with one hand while the fingers of his other hand drove her mad. This was Mulder, she was safe here. She felt herself melting into his touch. She didn’t realize that she was moaning, but
he did and his eyes smiled though he managed to keep it from his lips.
He
found that bundle of nerves and pressed gently on it.
She tensed slightly and he started to withdraw. “Please.
Mulder, please.” He
relaxed slightly and continued loving her. She
was moving now, increasing the pressure herself. “Mulder!” And then she was coming in his arms. She was clutching his shoulders, her head back,
her eyes closed. “Oh God, Mulder.” Her body was still shuddering and he held her as
she came back to herself.
“Why
the tears?” He asked gently as he
brushed a tear from her cheek.
“I
never thought . . . I believed that was over for me, that I never . . . that not even you . . . “
“Shhhh.” He pulled her to him then and held her as she
cried, partly from relief, partly from joy.
There
was time; there were no secrets between them now. He
loved her and she knew it. And better yet,
she loved him. She wasn't sure about
everything yet, but now she could start to believe in things again. Now they
could truly be together.
-
Fin -
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