The
car screeched to a halt and Mulder vaulted from it.
There were police and emergency workers everywhere. He hurried toward the building, his ID in his
hand. He heard a couple of the cops talking,
the guy was dead. Well, that explained some
of the activity. He raced up the stairs
searching for her. If she'd had to shoot the
guy she would need his support.
He
followed the activity and forced his way into the apartment. He spotted the body of the older man lying near
the kitchen counter. He was obviously dead
but hadn't been moved. Pictures of the crime
scene needed to be taken, besides that’s not where the activity was taking place. He turned and saw the red hair splayed out on the
floor.
The
universe shrank down to the size of the room and everything ground to a halt. The planet quit turning, air no longer moved, his
heart quit beating and his lungs stopped the flow of oxygen to his cells. He felt himself move in her direction but it
seemed to take centuries to make progress. His
eyes devoured her, taking in the massive amount of blood covering her, her chest, her
throat, the frothy blood at her lips. Her
lips, that meant her lung was hit, what else? And
why weren't they helping her, the only thing that still flowed was her blood. The gauze was soaked, why couldn't they stop the
bleeding? Did she have that much blood? The paramedic had his hand on her wound, trying to
staunch the flow, it wasn't working.
What
had happened? Had Fellig shot her? Before or after she shot him? Why in all hell was he thinking about that, it
didn't matter. Nothing mattered. She was in bad shape, they should be transporting
her, getting her to the hospital, saving her. One
of the EMTs slipped an oxygen mask over her nose and mouth.
He wanted to ask her condition, but he couldn't make a sound.
"We've
got to move her. She's not stabilizing, we've
got to get her in." Mulder heard the
words but they seemed to come from miles away. She's
not stabilizing. They were losing her. They were losing her, why couldn't he move?
"On
three." They had her on the gurney. The movement had caused her to lose even more
blood. He could see the pool closing in on
the floor where she had lay, coating the floor, probably dripping into the apartment
below.
He was helpless, Scully, his Scully was dying and there was nothing he could do. He could feel himself start to die as well. He moved to follow them downstairs, but the fourth EMT, the one waiting with the second ambulance to transport the body stopped him. "Sir, you can't go with them. They'll be working on her the whole way. You wouldn't want to obstruct them."
Mulder
tried to focus on the man; he was keeping him from Scully.
No one did that. Too many had tried; it was never going to happen
again. "Sir, please. You can join her at St. Andrews. Please, for her sake."
For
her sake. The only phrase that could have
gotten to him. He heard the siren start up. They had lost no time heading for St. Andrews.
Okay,
he couldn't do a lot for her right now, but he had to be there. If anything did happen . . . No! He needed to get to her.
He
turned toward the stairs when he felt the hand on his arm.
He turned to see Agent Ritter. The
man was white as a sheet and shaking. "It
was an accident Mulder. I . . . I didn't
think the bullet . . . "
Mulder's
eyes widened and he looked more closely at the shaken man in front of him. "What happened?" The shorter man flinched at the tone, the
intensity of the question.
"She
was . . . she was behind him. I didn't know
the bullet would go through him. I . . . I
thought - "
"You
shot Scully. You shot at a suspect, an
unarmed suspect, while my partner was in the line of fire?
Is that what you're saying? Is
that what happened?"
Mulder
seemed to grow in front of the frightened agent. "It
was an accident, I - "
"An
accident!" Now the furious man stepped
toward him and he stumbled back. "Have
you ever been on a case before! What the
hell kind of training have you had!" His
hands came up as though to throttle Ritter and two of the police officers stepped in to
protect the man.
Mulder
held up his hands to show that he wasn't going to hurt him, at least not right this
minute. "Your ass is mine Agent Ritter. If Scully . . . if anything happens to Agent
Scully, you will pay. You will pay with
everything you have, right down to your dying breath."
Agent
Ritter nodded, not doubting this man's word for an instant.
"I'm
on the way to St. Andrews. I'll see to you
later." Mulder turned then and moved
toward the stairs, his speed picking up as he neared his car. He'd wasted valuable time on that fucking idiot,
time he should have spent with her. If this
delay had cost him any time with . . . He'd kill the man, in cold blood. He wouldn't be convicted. There wouldn't be time.
He
found St. Andrews with no trouble. He's seen
the signs on his way from the airport. He
parked in the emergency lot, tossing his FBI parking sticker in the window. He didn't know how long he would be here and he
wasn't about to be bothered by something as mundane as a car.
He
realized he actually sounded calm when he asked for information about her. It was his badge that got it for him. They'd bypassed the ER, taking her directly to
surgery. He was directed to the fourth floor,
but no other information was available.
He
was less self-assured by the time he'd reached her floor.
Bypassing the emergency room meant . . . no, they had gotten her here alive. That's what mattered. That's all that mattered. She was alive.
He tried to sit in the waiting room, but that was impossible. He rose, pacing around the room, which fortunately
was empty.
His
mind returned to Ritter and he felt the anger grow inside of him again. No, not now.
He had other priorities now. That
little asshole prick would pay, but later.
He
made yet another circuit of the room. Time
lost all meaning, he didn’t know if he had been there for five minutes or five
months. What was happening?
He
looked up to see a woman walking toward him. His
fear tried to bring him to his knees and he saw her hand come out as though to support
him. No!
If she had news which would cause him to need support . . .
“Agent
Mulder? I’m Pam Simons. I’m a patient advocate here at the hospital. Can I get you anything?”
Scully!
I want Scully! But he kept quiet, merely
shaking his head.
She
motioned for him to take a seat and after a short hesitation he did and she joined him on
the couch. “Agent Mulder, is there
anyone I can call for you? Is Ms. Scully
married?”
Yes! Again his mind leaped with an answer, another one
he couldn’t give.
“Uh,
no, Scully’s not married.”
“What
about parents, siblings?”
“Are
you saying I should get her family here?” He
was surprised the words came out, his chest felt as though there was an iron band around
it. Was that the symptom of a heart attack,
or just of him dying along with her?
She
looked away for a second and back. “Agent
Scully’s condition is very serious.”
“Have
you . . . have you spoken with the doctor?”
“Agent
Mulder,” she hesitated, “Frankly the doctor was amazed that she survived long
enough to go into surgery. She must be an
extremely strong woman.”
He
nodded, his eyes focused on the past, other examples of her strength.
“Would
you like me to call her family for you?”
He
straightened up. “No. No, I’ll call her mother. How much longer . . .?”
“Agent
Mulder, there’s no way to know that.”
He
took a deep breath and nodded, pulling his cell phone from the inside pocket of his suit
coat.
“Hello?”
“Mrs.
Scully, it’s Fox Mulder.” How
the hell was he going to do this?
“Fox,
I . . . what’s wrong? Where’s Dana?”
“She’s
in New York, New York City, at St. Andrews Hospital.”
“What
happened Fox? How is she?”
“She
was shot.” He didn’t answer the
second question.
“But
I thought you were on desk duty.” She
sounded confused.
“AD
Kersh gave her an assignment and - “
“Without
you? He sent her out of town on an assignment
without you!” He could practically see her steady herself. “You didn’t tell me how she was.”
“They,
uh, they think you should hurry.”
“Fox,
you’re there, aren’t you? You stay
with her. Don’t you leave her side. I’m on my way.” The connection was broken before he could speak. He slipped the phone back in his pocket. Don’t leave her side. How could he?
It
finally occurred to him that he hadn’t called the office. He was AWOL. When he’d gotten the information on Fellig,
he’d walked out, trying to get to her. But
he’d been too late. Was that what Kersh
had in mind? Fuck him; he’d almost
gotten Scully killed. He owed the man
nothing.
He
was seated on the couch now, his head back, eyes closed.
He’d been here in this position for centuries. As much as he wanted word, he was terrified for
them to speak to him. That’s why he kept
his eyes closed - no one tried for a conversation.
The
footsteps were approaching him this time. It
was Pam. He hadn’t realized he’d
already learned the sound of her. These
footsteps seemed reluctant, hesitant. Oh
god.
She
touched his shoulder, “Agent Mulder?” He
kept his eyes closed for a moment longer. If
she didn’t tell him, then Scully wasn’t dead.
Not yet, he couldn’t face it.
“Agent
Mulder,” she shook his shoulder lightly. “Dr.
Phillips is here to talk with you.”
Dr.
Phillips? The surgeon. His eyes flew open at that and he came to his
feet.
“Scully?” He wanted to ask more, but it was the only word
that formed.
“Agent
Mulder.” The doctor shook his hand,
“Ms. Scully survived the surgery. She’s
being moved to ICU.”
“She’s
going to be okay.” It wasn’t really
a question.
“There’s
some reason for optimism.”
“Optimism?” They were going to think he was a moron, but he
didn’t really care.
“Please,
have a seat Agent Mulder.” Dr. Phillips
gestured toward the couch and sat beside him. Pam
sat in the chair nearest Mulder. “Don’t
be disappointed in my choice of phrase Agent Mulder.
I had very little cause for optimism about her condition when she arrived. We’re keeping a close eye on her, but she is
not out of the woods. I’ll be staying at
the hospital this evening to keep an eye on her.
Mulder
nodded, “May I see her?”
“She’s
in recovery now. Maybe in a few - “
“Please. I won’t be in the way. I need to see her.” His intensity startled the doctor and something
made him think of the gun the agent was no doubt wearing.
“Agent
Mulder, it’s against policy - “
“I
understand that. If I get in the way, they
can throw me out. Please.”
Dr.
Phillips glanced over at Pam, who shrugged. After
a long moment he nodded and stood. “The
nurses will have the authority to evict you. If
you give them any trouble . . . “ He left the sentence unfinished, the rest was
unnecessary.
*****
She
looked dead, as white as the sheets covering her. Tubes
were everywhere and the monitors traced bright colored lines. He moved to her side as the doctor spoke to the
nurse. He didn’t bother to listen, he
was here now and he was going to stay. He
traced her cheekbone and bent down to whisper in her ear.
“I’m here Scully. I’ll
be here as long as you need me. Just relax
and get stronger.”
He
was as good as his word, moving out of the way whenever a nurse approached even before
being asked. The thing the nurses noted,
other than his ass, was that his hand never left her body - he touched her hand or leg,
even foot, but remained in contact.
And
she began a slow but steady improvement. It
was nothing he could see, but when Dr. Philips returned, he was delighted with her
progress. He was happy enough to have her moved to the surgical ICU and out of recovery. The doctor even had a chair brought in for him.
On
the hour Mrs. Scully was allowed in. He
looked up again as someone approached the bed. He
was on his feet immediately. “Mrs.
Scully, no one told me you were here.”
“It’s
okay Fox. I’ve spoken with her doctor. He told me you were with her.”
“Here,
please take the chair.”
They
both jumped as she finally stirred. “Dana,
Honey it’s Mom. Can you hear me?” She leaned over her daughter, willing her to
speak.
“Mulder?”
He
could hear the pain in her voice, and the fear. He
brought his hand up to her cheek. “I’m
here Scully. I’m right here.” They could see her relax and Mrs. Scully smiled
her relief up at him.
*****
He
looked up as the door opened and his heart sank as he watched Bill enter the room. He hadn’t been aware her brother was coming.
Bill
came over to his sister and lightly caressed her cheek, then hugged his mother. Mulder didn’t rise; he was fairly confidant
that Bill didn’t want to shake his hand anyway.
“I
see you nearly got her killed again.” Bill
spoke low so as not to wake her. Mulder
looked back down at her face and didn’t answer.
“Bill!” Mrs. Scully hissed at him; that was the only
description of the sound she had made. “Come
outside with me.”
“He’s
the one that should step outside.”
“Fox
is doing exactly what he needs to do right now and I want him to stay.” She had risen from chair on the opposite side of
Scully’s bed, and moved toward the door.
Bill
shot one more glare at Mulder and followed her. Mulder
said nothing; there was nothing to say, not to Bill.
Once alone with her again, he leaned in closer. “Your brother’s here Scully. You need to wake up and talk to him.” He squeezed her hand and continued talking,
wishing the conversation was two-sided. That
brief consciousness she had experienced two days ago was the only time she’d spoken. Even the doctor was worried at this point, though
he tried to be positive in front of them.
It
was some time before the door opened again. Bill
entered alone.
“Is
your Mom okay?” Mulder knew she usually
had to be dragged from Scully’s bedside, not unlike him.
“She’s
lying down for a little while. She’s
exhausted.” Mulder nodded. “You look like you could use a break too.”
“I’m
fine.” Scully’s phrase he realized,
but it seemed to fit.
Bill
sat in the chair his mother had vacated. “I
. . . Mulder, I uh,” He looked up at Mulder who was watching him curiously. “I owe you an apology. Mom told me what happened. I’m . . . I’m sorry. This wasn’t your fault.”
“Yes
it was. It’s all my fault.”
“How
- “
“If
I hadn’t been so busy fucking up my career, her career, all these years, I might have
been there with her. I could have protected
her, like I should have.” He was gazing
at her face.
Bill
watched him for a moment. “This one’s
not your fault. Mom said her partner shot -
“
“He’s
not her partner.” Bill actually leaned
back, away from him.
“No,
he’s not. I apologize again.”
That
startled Mulder, and calmed him down more than he could remember being in Bill’s
presence.
“Why
weren’t you there?”
“Kersh. He decided to try and save Scully’s career.”
“Damn,
he’s worse at it than you are.” Mulder’s
eyes widened, but he didn’t speak. What
was there to say?
Bill
was watching him now, silently, and it was making him more and more uncomfortable. He couldn’t leave her, he wouldn’t, but
why was this man . . .
Finally
Bill sighed, “You’re in love with her.”
Mulder opened his mouth for his automatic denial. “Don’t bother, Mulder. I’m not happy about it, but that doesn’t
make it untrue.”
“I’ve
never - “
“I
don’t know how she feels about you.” He
continued as though Mulder hadn’t spoken. “You’re
not exactly on our list of approved topics. She’s
gonna live Mulder.” Mulder’s hand
tightened its grip on hers and Bill noted it. “Mom
says it’s because of you.” He
ignored Mulder’s shock, “I don’t know about that either.” He sighed, “I suppose I should get used to
you, it doesn’t look like I’m going to get rid of you anytime soon.”
Mulder
didn’t comment, he was still feeling his way toward having this man here and less
than hostile toward him.
“Mulder,
take a break. You need to stretch your legs. Come on, I won’t leave her alone.”
“If
she wakes up - “
“If
she wakes up I’ll page you. I promise. Mulder, take advantage of having me here, I won’t
let anything happen to her.”
The
uncertainty on Mulder’s face actually touched Bill.
He didn’t like the man, but his sister’s welfare was obviously
Mulder’s only concern.
After
a long moment Mulder rose. “You’ll
page me.”
“You
have my word.” Mulder nodded, looked
down at her one more time and headed out of the room.
Bill watched him, shaking his head, but would he be any different if it were
Tara lying here?
Mulder
hadn’t been gone ten minutes when she stirred. "Dana? Dana, it's Bill.
Can you hear me?"
"Mulder." She hadn't opened her eyes, but she was restless,
moving in the bed. That probably wasn't good
for her. He pressed the call button and to
his surprise received an almost immediate response. "I
think she's waking up. Agent Mulder needs to
be paged."
"I'm
sure Agent Mulder will be right back."
"Do
you want to be the one to tell him she was asking for him and you didn't page him?"
She
looked up at him. "No."
"Me
either." She smiled then and after
checking the monitors left the room. "Mulder's
coming Dana. Wake on up and open your eyes,
please."
She
continued to jerk in the bed, searching, her hand taking his and releasing it. They didn't have to page twice. Bill heard him coming and wondered idly if he'd
hurt anyone getting back here.
He
burst in the room and was at her side before Bill could speak. "Scully?
I'm here Scully."
"Can't
forget your name." Mulder looked up at
Bill puzzled. "Don't want to live long
enough to forget your name." A tear
escaped her eye and her grip on Mulder's hand tightened.
"Scully,
you're not going to forget my name. I
wouldn't let you. It's just a nightmare. Come on Scully, wake up. You're only dreaming."
He
caressed her cheek and Bill almost turned away. It
was such an intimate gesture when Mulder touched her, even innocently. Her eyes fluttered and finally opened. "Mulder?"
His
smile lit up the room. "It's about time
you woke up. You've got a hell of a lot of
paperwork to do, and I'm not going to get stuck with it."
"Where
are we?" She sounded weak, but she was
alive, awake.
"New
York." Mulder had forgotten Bill was
even there. Bill kept quiet just watching
these two together.
"Fellig? Ritter."
Mulder's
face hardened. "Don't worry about
him."
"Did
he . . .? Mr. Fellig, is he okay?"
"He's
dead Scully." He looked away from her
then and spotted Bill. His face reddened
slightly. "Scully, Bill's here, and your
mother."
She
turned toward where he was facing. "Bill? How long have I been here?"
"Three
days." Bill answered for him. "You were pretty sick."
"They
called you to come?" Her grip tightened
on Mulder's hand again. "Is Mom
okay?"
"She'll
be better now. I'll go get her." Bill moved toward the door.
*****
Sitting
up wasn't nearly as painful as it had been. Mulder
was talking, but she wasn't listening to the words, just his voice.
They
both turned at the tap on the door. Agent
Ritter stuck his head in. He spotted Mulder
and blanched. Scully noted the look of fear
on his face. He obviously hadn't known
Mulder was in here with her. She felt just a
second of sympathy for the man. She had no
doubt Mulder had reacted like the wrath of God when he found out this man had come so
close to killing her. She looked down - there
was no reason for either man to see how much that meant to her.
"I,
uh, I'm sorry. I just wanted to . . . "
Ritter stuttered to a stop.
She
looked up, "Mulder." Mulder looked
down and Ritter watched some unspoken communication pass between them. He'd heard about that, but he had dismissed it as
another spooky legend. Well, this one was
true.
"I'll
be out in the hall." Mulder squeezed her
hand and left the room after one last glance at the other man. He stood just outside the door; he could see
Ritter talking to Scully. He kept a tight
grip on his temper. If he assaulted the man
here they'd probably be able to save him.
He
wasn't in there long, and of course Mulder was waiting as he came out. He stopped and turned to face the taller agent. Mulder spoke quietly, devoid of emotion. "You're a lucky man."
Ritter
nodded silently, grateful when nothing further was said, and made his escape.
Mulder
returned to her room and took her hand back into his.
"The coroner's report came back on Felig. It says he died of a single gunshot wound. That's all it said." He squeezed her hand again. "I talked to your doctor. He said you're doing great. You're making the fastest recovery he's ever
seen."
"You
know, Mulder, I don't even know how I entertain the thought . . . "
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